Friday, February 24, 2006

As I get older, people often ask me if I miss or think I will miss not having children. Of course I sometimes wonder, but I do get to experience a lot of the joyful activities of having children through the interactions with my family.

For example, this weekend I'm helping my neice review and consider potential colleges (she wants to major in advertising, so if anyone has suggestions, please post comments!). Anyone who knows me knows I was made for this type of conversation. I value education so much and want the best for everyone around me and I am so honored that she considers my opinion important enough to take part in this decision.

I've had loads of opportunities with my sisters, of course. Being 10 and 12 years older than they are, I was there when they were born and took care of them until I went to college. My relationship was more sporadic during those years, but when they got older (and I calmed down from all the partying) we were able to forge strong ties. That means I was there when the middle one decided to tell someone she had gone behind my parents back and joined the navy (thankfully we talked her out of it before she was shipped out), I was there when she turned 21 and drank her first - and last - Jagermeister. I have been there a few times to meet select boyfriends, and I fretted and worried with her when she bought her first house. I was there when the little one needed back surgery, when she decided to change colleges and when she needed new clothes for her intership with a state senator.

I think about and worry about them and hope for their happiness and success. I feed them when I can and pass them money when they need it. Those experiences are real and powerful and the closest I will get to experiencing parenthood. And I guess when I hear my friends complain about sleepless nights and surly teenagers, I really do feel blessed. For the most part, I get to experience the good stuff. All the "bad" stuff is left for the real parents.


Me and the young rock kids at the Rose Bar in Cologne, Germany.

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Traveling DINK

I've been traveling in Europe this week - Germany and the UK. The Boy has been traveling a bit as well in the US while I've been gone. With only the cat to take care of at this point, it makes me wonder what folks with kids do when opportunities or requirements of this nature arise? What arrangements, if any, can those with kids make?

Maybe that's why most of the middle managers and execs in my office are (A) men and (B) have wives who stay home with their children. In order to make life "work" in a relationship like that, does it require that one partner give up their own ambitions and travel opportunities to keep the home fires burning?

I guess that's why The Boy and I just have the cat. Those are sacrifices I'm not willing to make. It's an easy decision since I don't have the kids and love them to pieces. I might feel differently if I did, of course.

At this point, though, I'm content to work hard and often and take my travel opportunities when I can get them.

I will say, though, that I'm not against the concept of a "wife." I think every relationship should have one (lol)--someone to be there when the electrician comes round, to pick up dry cleaning and do all the shopping. Someone to comfort emotionally and physically, to support and be your champion. (and all for the relatively cheap price of nothing.) Yes, who wouldn't want an assistant like that?